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Monday, April 11, 2016

Dowry system

I think if we go and look at the history, Dowry was actually not an evil practice. It was a means to distribute parent’s wealth equally among all their children - sons and daughters. Dowry in the form of gifts, wealth and property was given to the bride to maintain her own financial and social independence.
With the time, human instinct took over and people started taking undue advantages of the practice. Slowly, the things gifted to the bride turned to the groom and his family.  I am sure that the day when a groom or his family demanded any sort of gift from bride or her family must have been the starting point of  converting it into present state.
Today, the moment a girl is born in the family, parents starts saving for her marriage. The dowry system has been rooted so deeply that many people end up being the victims unknowingly.

Crown on her head,
Smile on her lips,
Frills in her dress,
Even when they went missing,
She was the princess of family.

They let her go,
High on hopes,
Hands in the prince,
To be the queen.

Throne, full of taunts,
Spiked with bruises,
She served the rule,
Paid the price.

Of not getting jewellery,
Of not getting dowry,
Of being a girl!

Right to education is one solution to this problem. But then, the past has proved that even education is not enough to curb dowry. The root cause is the mentality of society. Dowry is nowadays considered as a matter of pride.
Some rich man gave a shining luxury car to his daughter. Some richer man gifted a gold pendant to all guests in his daughter wedding. There are some phrases which force people to show off more and more. At the same time, incidents like these exert unbearable pressure on middle class and poor families. They eventually end up spending all their hard earned money on the weddings and some even borrow it as well.
Some guy refused to take any gift from the girl's family. Some well settled family married it's son to a poor family and shared the marriage expenses. Incidents like these are also heard these days, but are very rare and soon forgotten. Time has come people start taking inspiration from latter ones rather than getting pressurized from former ones.

A girl sent her barat back when she heard her to be father in law demanding dowry. Incidents like this are very-very rare. I think they are the one which are most powerful and motivational. We must try and encourager such brave hearts to a life full of happiness rather than reminding them about the negative consequences in society hence followed.

This post is written as a part of April 2015 A to Z Challenge. My theme for this year is 'WOMEN and ISSUES AROUND THEME'. Click at the link to check other common issues women face in and their respective links.

3 comments:

  1. My family is one of those middle-class types, so a dowry wasn't even a consideration.
    Melanie Schulz from
    Melanie Schulz.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Amita, your blog has a lot of guts. As a woman, I applaud you.

    Visiting from A to Z.

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  3. As usual very nice post .... Thanks for this!! :) :)

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